Depression is unique with each person, and this page is designed to help you discover your own emotional truth. Even if you have suffered with depression your whole life, there is hope. In coming to this site you have begun to take action to improve your life, and you should be congratulated.
Free Self Help Exercises
You might find that one or two of these exercises may not be a great fit for you, but it is important that you try each of them. You may discover some uncomfortable truths about yourself in doing these exercises. Try to be nice to yourself, and schedule a session if you want some help or support. If you become overwhelmed at any point, just stop and rest. If you have a history of abuse, panic or thoughts of self-harm, please schedule a session or go through these exercises with your therapist.
Some of these exercises ask you to complete a sentence. Please read the sentence-stem either aloud or silently and then let the sentence finish itself without trying to pre-think an ending. Feel free to change the sentence-stem in order to make it feel more true. Repeat the exercise over and over until you are not getting any new endings before going on to the next one.
1. Please imagine the important people in your life (including your family) and get a clear picture of them. Now imagine saying to them, “I need to be depressed because…” and let the sentence finish itself.
Keep doing this until you are getting no new endings.
When you are finished, write down some of the sentences that felt strongest.
2. Now continue to be there with those people and try saying to them, “If I’m not depressed, then…” and let the sentence finish itself.
Keep doing this until you are getting no new endings.
When you are finished, write down some of the sentences that felt strongest.
3. Now imagine waking up in the morning and going through the day without any trace of feeling depressed. Not only is there no depression, but you know that you never will feel depressed again. Pay careful attention to anything that feels unwelcome about this reality. Spend some time with this experience before moving on.
Write down what you learn.
4. Now get in touch with your feeling of depression. You may imagine a scenerio that would provoke it. Feel the depression in your body, and then ask it, “What is your job?” or “How do you serve me?” and wait for it to answer.
Spend some time with this experience before moving on.
Write down what you learn.
By this point, many people will feel like they have found a part of themselves that they did not know existed. You may have discovered that you had an important purpose for being depressed. It may have been a way to ask for care, or a way to protest the way you have been treated. It is important not to turn this part of yourself into an enemy, but rather make it into a friend. You can do this by not trying to change it. Instead just accept it and let it be true. You should also spend some time each day reading over what you have learned about your depression. Many people will feel a strong need to have someone with whom to share this new truth. You can tell a trusted friend, a support group or schedule a session with a therapist.
“I need to feel depressed because it is the only way anyone will ever pay attention to me.”
–Meghan
“I need my family to see how badly they hurt me and that’s why I need to be depressed.”
–Adam from Colorado
“Depression gives me a way of saying I hurt therefore I’m here and my feelings mean something.”
–M. from California
“I need to feel depressed because there is no other way to express my pain to the loved ones who hurt me.”
– Magda from Chicago
“I need to be depressed because it’s a way for me to find out if anyone cares.”
– Chanel from Dracut, MA
“If i’m not depressed I’m vunerable to be someone I’ve never been before.”
– Rebecca from Sheffield (UK)
“I need to be depressed so I can live through the next 4 years (2007-2011) that way I might reach my objective.”
– Miguel S. from Portugal
“I need to feel depressed to get away from reality.”
– Anonymous from Sydney, Australia
“Depression makes me feel like people really care about me. They pay more attention if I look really sad.”
– Marissa from Auburn, NY
Other factors for relieving depression
In addition to working with emotions, there are other important factors in helping to relieve depression. Please look over the following in addition to discovering your emotional truth. It is very important to remember that if anything on this list is difficult for you to do, there may be a hidden emotional truth against doing it. If so, try adapting the discovery exercises above to learn about this emotional truth, or click schedule a session to get help from a therapist.
- Try finding something joyful. When most of the things in someone’s life are negative, the normal human response is to be sad. If most of the people in your life are critical and don’t treat you well, it will be important to find new people who are kinder. This may be very difficult, and the support of a therapist can help.
- If you are going through a hard time, try to take breaks from your negative feelings by doing something you enjoy.
- Get enough sleep, eat right, find some support (like a friend or group). Some people do not want to burden their friends with their troubles. Going to a support group is a good solution to this situation. You might try AA, CODA, or Depression Anonymous.
- Stop drinking alcohol if you can. If you can’t, try going to AA. Alcohol has a depressive effect on your brain.
- Stop caffeine and sugar if you can. If you can’t, try going to OA. They have been showed to decrease mood after the initial high.
- Get enough sunlight and exercise. They have been shown to be as effective as many forms of therapy at treating depression.
- Try to practice deep breathing for 10-20 minutes each day. Find a safe, calm place, sit comfortably, and take deep slow breaths. Let yourself concentrate on the sensation of breathing in your nose, chest or belly. You will soon find yourself lost in thoughts and worries. When you do, congratulate yourself. You successfuly noticed that your mind wandered. Then go back to the breathing. It is not important that you prevent your mind from wandering. Just try to notice that it has, and return to your breathing.
- You may want to practice sending yourself love and compassion for 10-20 minutes a day. Find a safe, calm place, sit comfortably, and take deep slow breaths. You may want to breathe into your depression. Now say to yourself, “May you be safe. May you be loved. May you be healthy. May you be peaceful.” Repeat these over and over again, just knowing that you want good things for yourself. You can also try sending these wishes to others. Knowing that someone wishes you well can be deeply helpful for people. You may also sit knowing that someone else wishes you well too.
- If you are feeling suicidal, click here.
